Beyond Words

I read a blog post yesterday that served as a kick in the rear… a much needed, overdue one. It’s been a thought provoking week which started with, as things often do for me, me picking up a new book to read. I’ve got a stack of work related books, a stack of motivational writer-type books, a stack of sexy, steamy books and a stack of everything else. I finish a book then cruise around looking for the cover, shape or title that just begs to be picked up. The trick is finding the right book for the mood of the moment.

I chose a memoir, Free Fall, A Late-in-Life Love Affair by Rae Padilla Francoeur. Wow, what a steamy and unsettling read. Steamy doesn’t require an explanation. Unsettling was all about me envisioning myself writing that kind of material. Rae is a 58 year old woman who falls in love with a 67 year old man. Age is crucial to this story, not just because they can still ‘perform’ but as it applies to our societal notion of passion at older ages.  I absolutely love how revealing this story is.

These two people are lovers of the most passionate sort.  Lovers who spend hours in bed exploring and possessing each other. It’s intense and raw.  When Rae writes of being consumed with and possessed by her passion, a deep physical experience even when Jim is not around, I am close to sharing the physical arousal.  She bares her soul to the reader. And, she does it tastefully. This is not porn, but rather an honest sensuous recounting of her experiences. Ms. Francoeur is a beautiful writer, but the beauty for me is in her story, and in what I imagine is her struggle to tell this story in all it’s raw details.

I happened upon a new blog today, The Mad to Live blog. The post is titled: The Cold Hard Truth, 3 Reasons We Stay Stuck in Limbo Country. I live in a land of limbo when it comes to my writing. Big time and it was like that post called me out and stuck me right on top of the mountain and dared me to get unstuck.  My limbo is my memoir. Laur, the blog’s owner, talks about fear and laziness and how the inability to know who we are and what we want keeps us stuck. Yes, ma’am. I got it.  I own it, or rather it owns me. And it keeps me from writing.

I finished Free Fall yesterday.  My path is not so dissimilar to Rae’s. I’ve come to the passionate part of my life at a late age.  There is value in telling my story but I’m stuck in my own version of limbo. If she had qualms about revealing the most intimate details of her life, it doesn’t show.  What I see is a woman who dared to proclaim her life and write about it. What I’ve found is a role model.

Photo by lui_lui at Flickr.   The book link takes you to Amazon.com